The five horrifying things your culinary arts teacher won't tell you!
Surprisingly, the culinary arts teacher also assigns a lot of things. I didn't get a perfect grade in this class, but not because of the quality of my work.
For years, the repressive government of the food industry had suppressed information on itself in its bid to make people get lower grades on its stuff sometimes. Eventually.
Finally the superhuman idiot they were waiting for came, and he fell into every trap they thought of. Hailing him as a hero, they made him their king. The King of the Donut Kingdom.
For years, the repressive government of the food industry had suppressed information on itself in its bid to make people get lower grades on its stuff sometimes. Eventually.
Finally the superhuman idiot they were waiting for came, and he fell into every trap they thought of. Hailing him as a hero, they made him their king. The King of the Donut Kingdom.
cookingsafetyhugerev.docx | |
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I mean a lot, and I have more saved from cookin' class then in history.
The longest assignment that was made within the boundaries of what she assigned us was this. It was long even for everybody else. A broad topic, with a billion prerequisites on the rubric I didn't know about until the last minute. I didn't get a good grade on this, but there you go.
Each rubric assignment has its own title and topic. Its very lengthy, at 7 pages or so with everything shrunk down and the margins reduced.
The assignment, of course, was to make a guide to food safety and safety procedures detailed enough that an actual restaurant could use it, or some fluff. All she expected is a bit long to ramble on about, not that it would take up much space, but see the assignment itself instead. Its things like how to resuscitate a dying person and a reminder to use the fire extinguisher. Not really obscure stuff. Also included, a bunch of forms that would be useful in the case that my house would suddenly be acquired by McDonalds.
As a franchised chain with its own unique homely atmosphere. Homegrown chickens and employee training and the like. (I'm pretty sure actual guides for restaurants could be even longer, and they would have more paper for it too. :V)
Still, I was pretty comprehensive with it, and the detail is exhaustive and exhausting to read. This is an accomplishment on par with actually writing a real crappy novel.
I think it's good. **** you. 😥
I used the internet a bit for this assignment too, although I found nothing so I wrote based upon my own natural strength and self-education. I know a lot of general facts for life and not burning down the house, so I put down a lot. Some note things way in the beginning of the school year were helpful too, with the three things that were provided. Supplementary materials were helpful for knowing what direction to go in though.
Because of this when McDonalds does inevitably take over the world I will have my own innovations that they will probably still spare me. This will be a work of greatness in those troubled times. And a portion of the general information I have on life will not be lost to the succeeding generations. (Have a bucket of water on hand if you were drafted into the food corps in a dingy decrepit chicken nugget factory.)
The longest assignment that was made within the boundaries of what she assigned us was this. It was long even for everybody else. A broad topic, with a billion prerequisites on the rubric I didn't know about until the last minute. I didn't get a good grade on this, but there you go.
Each rubric assignment has its own title and topic. Its very lengthy, at 7 pages or so with everything shrunk down and the margins reduced.
The assignment, of course, was to make a guide to food safety and safety procedures detailed enough that an actual restaurant could use it, or some fluff. All she expected is a bit long to ramble on about, not that it would take up much space, but see the assignment itself instead. Its things like how to resuscitate a dying person and a reminder to use the fire extinguisher. Not really obscure stuff. Also included, a bunch of forms that would be useful in the case that my house would suddenly be acquired by McDonalds.
As a franchised chain with its own unique homely atmosphere. Homegrown chickens and employee training and the like. (I'm pretty sure actual guides for restaurants could be even longer, and they would have more paper for it too. :V)
Still, I was pretty comprehensive with it, and the detail is exhaustive and exhausting to read. This is an accomplishment on par with actually writing a real crappy novel.
I think it's good. **** you. 😥
I used the internet a bit for this assignment too, although I found nothing so I wrote based upon my own natural strength and self-education. I know a lot of general facts for life and not burning down the house, so I put down a lot. Some note things way in the beginning of the school year were helpful too, with the three things that were provided. Supplementary materials were helpful for knowing what direction to go in though.
Because of this when McDonalds does inevitably take over the world I will have my own innovations that they will probably still spare me. This will be a work of greatness in those troubled times. And a portion of the general information I have on life will not be lost to the succeeding generations. (Have a bucket of water on hand if you were drafted into the food corps in a dingy decrepit chicken nugget factory.)
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The first of the many long culinary arts assignments was this gem, buried deep in the annals of my hard drive. Although the formatting is outdated and the prose is of questionable merit this is revealing about the common multimedia format in the age of the 90s.
This one isn't so long.
We were supposed to do an assignment on a food service occupation. But wait! No waiters, no heroes, no gods. Only servers. So being about that invalidates half of it somehow.
I looked up some facts on waiters, which no one else did, but it wasn't even necessary. Again, invalidated. This assignment probably could have been vanquished much more simply, but invalidated. No, I'm not salty.
This is from near the beginning of the projects of the school year. I think the first one, actually. In class we kind of just leap from topic to topic, and of the things that are relevant to an education in food stuffs all the common occupations are a topic of interest. We did a safety test in the beginning of the year. Then we learned us some things about food types throughout the year from textbooks without verbal lectures continuing today. And somewhere in the beginning we did this, somehow.
I do not see how a simple description of the job that most people barely write on and some courtesies that you make up and copy from what you write in class is a boon to your future employability but whatever. Also it must be as close-mindedly organised as possible, so no real outside information. Ok.
But mine has a bit more. Not much, but if length is a measure of dedication, then I have slightly more dedication. Ok.
This one isn't so long.
We were supposed to do an assignment on a food service occupation. But wait! No waiters, no heroes, no gods. Only servers. So being about that invalidates half of it somehow.
I looked up some facts on waiters, which no one else did, but it wasn't even necessary. Again, invalidated. This assignment probably could have been vanquished much more simply, but invalidated. No, I'm not salty.
This is from near the beginning of the projects of the school year. I think the first one, actually. In class we kind of just leap from topic to topic, and of the things that are relevant to an education in food stuffs all the common occupations are a topic of interest. We did a safety test in the beginning of the year. Then we learned us some things about food types throughout the year from textbooks without verbal lectures continuing today. And somewhere in the beginning we did this, somehow.
I do not see how a simple description of the job that most people barely write on and some courtesies that you make up and copy from what you write in class is a boon to your future employability but whatever. Also it must be as close-mindedly organised as possible, so no real outside information. Ok.
But mine has a bit more. Not much, but if length is a measure of dedication, then I have slightly more dedication. Ok.
foodie12.pptx | |
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I don't know what the grading for the beautiful work of art this is must be, but it must be good, right? It's beautiful.
We were asked to design a menu and account for all the costs that went into food. This required much, even a ridiculous amount of independent research. Funny how hard it is to find out how much black pepper costs when you can just search for it with Google shopping. And then post that you need to find out what the cost for the amount used in the dish is, which is actually less time-consuming. I made a page for ten dishes and found pictures. From the pictures and ingredients you can imagine how mouth-watering and fresh they would be. It makes the inside of my mouth wet just thinking about it. Its a work of art. Food porn.
I didn't make that up. Ah! I swear! I'm not a pervert. ;_;
I do hope I got a good grade on it -I did not get a look. Then it would be significant as probably the only good grade I got in this class. Not that I care about grading above how much I myself know it's worth.
Take a look inside. You must be at least 18 years of age or whatever the age of legal consent in your region is.
From this I learned that cajun burgers and spices named after places were a thing. They make everything in Louisiana. Some things would make you wet your pants. And not always in a good way.
No really, things that are ambiguous about how easily they can be found tend to hard to find. Then if they are on waves of half-dozens at a time...
We were asked to design a menu and account for all the costs that went into food. This required much, even a ridiculous amount of independent research. Funny how hard it is to find out how much black pepper costs when you can just search for it with Google shopping. And then post that you need to find out what the cost for the amount used in the dish is, which is actually less time-consuming. I made a page for ten dishes and found pictures. From the pictures and ingredients you can imagine how mouth-watering and fresh they would be. It makes the inside of my mouth wet just thinking about it. Its a work of art. Food porn.
I didn't make that up. Ah! I swear! I'm not a pervert. ;_;
I do hope I got a good grade on it -I did not get a look. Then it would be significant as probably the only good grade I got in this class. Not that I care about grading above how much I myself know it's worth.
Take a look inside. You must be at least 18 years of age or whatever the age of legal consent in your region is.
From this I learned that cajun burgers and spices named after places were a thing. They make everything in Louisiana. Some things would make you wet your pants. And not always in a good way.
No really, things that are ambiguous about how easily they can be found tend to hard to find. Then if they are on waves of half-dozens at a time...
cultheweak.docx | |
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Originally for a poster, my talent for composing massive amounts of reading material comes out yet again. Culinary mega-assignment of the weak. For this we had to describe the food of a country. You'd expect me to have a lot to say on a country through research but that's not really what its about and yes I got a bullcrap grade on this one too. Not because I didn't have information that everyone else had, but it was organised to seem that it didn't have it UNLESS YOU ACTUALLY LISTENED TO WHAT I WAS SAYING WHATEVER BRADFORD.
No literary master-strokes on this one and how would you expect one to have it, with the subject thus presented, not on the actual intrigues of the country. Still, I learned a lot of new things about Turkey's cuisine and I can at least appreciate that. I now know for example, that Turkey is lush and not all desert. I learned it had the hedgehog and the moose. I learned Turkish dishes are simply prepared and hearty and liked by many. I learned about the doner kebab and where it came from. I learned about the cultural pulls on Turkey from Arabia and the Caucasus.
On a poster, as much learning as I could fit in it. I don't think mine was badly designed either. Does she not like duct tape holding printed papers to it? :(
I don't use glue. What is glue. It sounds like the craftstuff of rebels and extremists and liberals. Allah akbar!
Which is ironic, cause see, if you read it you'd know Turkey is an actually proudly liberal country in that one time it was presented.
Turkey's actually a pretty interesting country, with some very interesting food. I am happy that I learned just a little bit more about it. Pseudo-European Middle-Eastern states ftw.
click here to go back to index.
No literary master-strokes on this one and how would you expect one to have it, with the subject thus presented, not on the actual intrigues of the country. Still, I learned a lot of new things about Turkey's cuisine and I can at least appreciate that. I now know for example, that Turkey is lush and not all desert. I learned it had the hedgehog and the moose. I learned Turkish dishes are simply prepared and hearty and liked by many. I learned about the doner kebab and where it came from. I learned about the cultural pulls on Turkey from Arabia and the Caucasus.
On a poster, as much learning as I could fit in it. I don't think mine was badly designed either. Does she not like duct tape holding printed papers to it? :(
I don't use glue. What is glue. It sounds like the craftstuff of rebels and extremists and liberals. Allah akbar!
Which is ironic, cause see, if you read it you'd know Turkey is an actually proudly liberal country in that one time it was presented.
Turkey's actually a pretty interesting country, with some very interesting food. I am happy that I learned just a little bit more about it. Pseudo-European Middle-Eastern states ftw.
click here to go back to index.